A special visit

After going to Disney with Mom and Trish I stayed

overnight with them since we got back late.

The next morning, sitting on the porch, I saw a bird

at the bird bath and decided to take pictures thinking he 

was a cardinal.  It wasn't until I reviewed the photos

that I realized he had a blue head, green back, red chest

and red ring around his eye.  I looked him up in Mom's 

bird book and he is a painted bunting.   I may have to

do a painting of him.

Trip to Disney with Mom and Trish

Disney day with Mom and Trish, thanks to Brian and Julianna

who left an after 4 pass for me to use.  It was decorated for fall

and halloween.  The weather was cool enough I had to wear

a sweater when it got dark.  It was a perfect day to go.

 New Belle's castle

Fireworks.  All the times I've been out there and worked

there for a total of 4 years - it was the first time I saw Tinkerbell

fly from the castle.  That would be a fun job!

Little Mermaid Castle

Fun time, thanks Mom and Trish

and Brian and Julianna.

And thanks for pushing me around in the

wheelchair Trish!

My Dad died August 31, 2013.

His funeral services were Thursday

September 5, 2013.

We love you Dad and miss you.

Dad's 80th birthday July 25, 2013

I hope my brother Terry doesn't mind me sharing what

he said at the funeral.  It was really great and that's why I

want to share it:

- The greatest compliment I ever received was when I was told, “You’re just like your father!”  Because Pop was a great man!

- As a young boy I wanted to be just like my father but as I got older I realized I couldn’t be.  Looking at my father, in many ways I could never measure up, but I could aspire to the values and character he modeled for us and I have tried to pass them on to my sons.  Pop was a man’s man, a strong man, and he was a big man, somewhat intimidating at times.  And he was good at everything he did.  I was never able to beat him in a round of golf!

- More importantly though, he was a family man.  He always wanted to be with Mom and us kids.  When he was in the Air Force he didn’t volunteer to go places he couldn’t take us.  Staying with the family was a priority for him.  He loved his family!  He loved my mom and he loved his children and grandchildren.  He was proud of all of us. 

- Pop was an honest man.  He instilled in us the importance of telling the truth, honesty, and integrity.  He was an example of being a man of his word, even when it was difficult or complicated.

- Pop was a man of faith and his faith became more and more important to him as he grew older.  His relationship with the Lord, the study of the Bible, and spending time in prayer changed his outlook on life.  I noticed the transformation as his priorities changed and as he grew in wisdom and Godliness. 

- Pop was a generous man.  He was always willing to help out his children… and not only his family, he reached out to help other people in need as well.  He had a tender heart, sensitive to the Holy Spirit’s prompting.  I didn’t realize it but Mom told me this week that one of Pop’s spiritual gifts was giving.  I think only she knows the full extent of his gift in this area.

- Even to the end, he was a smart man.  Whether he was whipping us in a game of hearts or giving us his political insights on current events; he was sharp.  I started calling more frequently in the past few years and it was always good to get his perspective on the issues I was facing.  Things like when to retire from the Air Force or what advice should I give one of the boys.  He would always have wise advice and valuable insights.  Even when I visited for his birthday a few short weeks ago, he was still passing on words of wisdom and good advice.  Unfortunately, I didn’t always follow his advice and at times I should have.  But I always learned from him.

- Unlike Vickie, Trisha and Stuart, I moved away from the family and Florida and never moved back.  So I would often think of my Dad the way he was when I left home when I was a teenager.  I remember him as the pillar of strength in our family. 

- Over the years when I came home to visit, I would notice the changes as he grew older but I would leave and go back home and my image of my father hadn’t changed.  In my mind I still remembered a younger, healthier Pop.  That’s the Pop I would visualize when we were talking on the phone each week.

- I got a call from my Mom at 2:40 in the morning last Saturday.  You definitely think the worst when the phone rings at that time at night (if you can think at all).  I was hoping it was a wrong number… but it wasn’t.  Mom and Stuart were with Pop early that morning and they had to call 911 and Pop was taken to the hospital.  Donna and I prayed for Pop and Mom and Stuart but I couldn’t go back to sleep.  I went into our family room and continued to think and pray.  It was 5 am when I felt a strong presence in the room with me.  I don’t know if it was Pop or the Holy Spirit, but I knew he was with Jesus and he was at peace. I felt at peace and was able to go back to sleep.  A couple of hours later, Mom called back and said, “it is finished.”  Pop’s suffering was over.  The Bible says, “for in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye…the perishable must clothe itself with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality…as it is written, Death has been swallowed up in victory.”   

- So don’t think of Pop like he was at his 80th birthday.  Think of him like I do, as a younger, stronger and happier man.  Actually, I can’t even imagine how glorious the heavenly experience was for him.  He has a new body, perfect and whole.  “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!”

- Pop, you won’t be joining us here anymore, but someday we’ll be joining you up there and on that day, our joy will be made complete.  

We love you!---

My life is in an unplanned, this is where you are whether you like it or not place.  No one ever chooses to have cancer, especially not stage 4.  To not know how long you’ve got left and to have the odds stacked against you is very unsettling.  But, no one knows how much time they have.  I could outlive anyone. With the traffic here in Orlando and the number of accidents per day - I feel like that’s stacking a few odds in my favor, unless I’m in one of those accidents, yikes.  

Chuck was in one 2 weeks ago.  He was on his way to pick me up from visiting my Dad in the hospital.  Sitting at a stoplight the guy behind him ran into him - never even touching his brakes.  So he’s been going to the Dr. and we’re driving a rental.  But I still believe God is in control.

At my Dr. visit Tuesday she told me, “With everything you have I would have expected to see the tumors growing and the cancer to be getting worse but it’s not doing anything, staying the same, and that is amazing.”  She too believes in God and the power of prayer and gives Him the credit for it.  I do have a lot of side effects from the treatments and pain from the tumors on bones but at least the cancer’s not getting any worse and demanding more icky treatments. 

On a more happy note, we've celebrated a few birthday's lately, mine, Dad's 80th, Jesse, Patsy, Mom.

Here are some pictures from Jesse's birthday:

She actually let us take pictures, wow!

Thanks Jesse!

 and yes, we tied balloons to each of the

dogs with their names on them because,

you know, we can't remember them all

 Jason loves Renny.  Everybody loves Renny.

 A rainbow the other day.  So pretty.

 I was outside taking pictures, this one of Alfred, and

I heard this weird bird sound.  Alfred was watching it.

I looked up and it was a humming bird about 3 feet away from

me.  I wish I'd gotten a picture of it but it was too fast.

 Something I did with clay a couple of days ago.

Today I read about being called to suffer from Streams in the Desert;

Be called to suffer which is our assignment here.  Can you not suffer, then one hour or two?  If He should call you from your cross today, say, “It is finished-that hard cross of yours from which you pray for deliverance.”  Do you not think that some emotion of regret would overcome you.  You would say, “So soon, let me go back and suffer yet awhile more patiently, I have not yet praised God.”

And from Jesus Calling:  Draw near to God and resist evil.  When you spend time with Me I restore your sense of direction.  As you look to Me for guidance, I enable you to do less but accomplish more.  Our sacred time together strengthens you and prepares you to face whatever the day will bring.  

It is an act of faith to wait before working.

From Unstoppable:  Live your life with a heart that is surrendered.  Even though things may be hard here, Christ calls these our light and momentary troubles.  They are bringing us an eternal weight of glory.  Look outside yourself and reach out to souls who need Him and His love.

Saturday

My aloe plant is blooming

 My orchids are blooming

The cat is.....

...weird

Jason is leaving today for the Army.

This is before Jesse gave him a haircut.

and after.. I didn't get a good after shot.

Jason, we will miss you and look forward to

you coming back home!

Corey and Minion, I said, "Corey look up."

so she did...

 And that was Saturday.

I was really inspired going through the Creative Call with the group that I believe God put together.

I thought after we finished I would continue to feel inspired and would get a lot accomplished.  Instead, I did nothing for a bit and felt kind of lost.

So Monday I picked up the book and starting glancing through it.  I got to page 99,  “A place for us” exercise.  I imagined, not what I have in the past.  This was different, a room with large windows overlooking the ocean (Pacific ocean).  It reminded me of a place we saw on the Pacific Coast Hwy., a hotel on the cliffs with rooms suspended over the ocean.  It was absolutely gorgeous.

As I was standing there looking at the beautiful view I felt a hand on my shoulder.

I turned and it was Jesus.  He was standing there smiling at me and said excitedly,

“Let’s see what you’re working on.”  Wow, I thought.  He would really want to see what I was doing?  He would really want to spend this time with me?

It gave me a different perspective.  I know that’s what Creative Call was about; working in the Holy Spirit, us spending time with God, listening to what He wants to teach us, having a relationship with Him.  But, it being where He came to me saying,  “Let’s see what you’re working on” not, let’s see what you’ve finished or what you’re selling.  The fact that He was excited about what I was doing, not done, not condemning, He was happy to be there, made it real and humbling.

So I did this little watercolor experiment; not completely finished but don’t really know what else to do with it.

I added stars to this one, just because there are always

stars when I envision anything with God.

A lot of things going on right now.  Different family members having health issues.  It has been a struggle to trust in all this.  I really am angry about the fact that some of the health care "guidelines" have kicked in and one of my family members can't even get an MRI because of it.  What good is healthcare and insurance if they don't allow you to get necessary tests done?  Without the tests there is no treatment.  I guess that's one way to save on healthcare.  It SUCKS!

Reading today;

Struggling with this right now. 

From Unstoppable by NickVujicic:

Surrendering is about giving up the illusion that you are in the driver’s seat.  Yes, you do decide how you act, when you act, and the attitude you present to the world.  Yes, you should dream and have goals for your life based on your passion.  But it is an illusion to think you can determine what happens to you and around you.  So all we really can do is prepare ourselves to manage the worst and do our best.  That means developing our gifts to their full potential so that whatever happens, we have faith in our ability to persevere and plunge ahead.

That driver’s seat thing is actually a literal for me.  My job the past 8 years was some type of driver; retired center, church bus, school bus and tractor trailer.  Now, I barely drive at all and I miss it.

But, it wasn’t who I am.  People sometimes lose themselves in their jobs and it becomes who they are. 

If that is the case for 14 years prior to that I home schooled our girls.  During that 14 years I taught private art lessons for home school children and during 2004 taught at Christian Victory Academy.  I sold portraits, or painted woodcrafts, worked at Sea World and Busch Gardens as a portrait artist.  I did whatever I could to earn extra money and usually with art.  If I go back through my past work record, teaching and being an artist, are what I’ve done the most.  I think it’s time to let go of the “driver” thing and grab onto the “artist” and maybe “teacher” thing.

Yes, you should have dreams and goals based on your passions and yes, it is an illusion to think you can determine what happens to you and around you. 

I am preparing myself to manage the worst and do my best.  I will work on practice, practice, practice, to get better with my art, writing, and anything else I feel God leading me to do.  I don’t want to put the word “speaking” out there but I feel it is an eventuality (is that a word?) and my biggest fear besides spiders.

And he writes:

The need to control everything around us can actually be a handicap.  When we spend all our time trying to remain in control, we risk missing the blessings that may come by putting faith into action and letting go. 

I wish to put faith into action and let go……..and see what happens.  Even with the health issues.....