Wednesday


I haven’t been posting as much as usual because I started going to a group that is reading the book, Creative Call by Janice Elsheimer.  What’s really great about this is Janice is part of the group.  I really enjoy hearing her talk about the different things she’s learned from writing the book and going through it with other people.  It is fascinating to me!  This is my 2nd or 3rd time going through it and I always come away inspired.

This morning I was reading on page 90 the following statements.  This is your life.  You are responsible for it.  You will not live forever.  Don’t wait.  Make the time now, even if it is ten minutes a week.
Having gone through the following the past 2 years makes this so real to me.
I had to retire because I have Stage IV breast cancer that has spread to my bones.  I had a lumpectomy, a port put in, a rod and bolt put in my left leg because a tumor ate 75% of the top of the femur, 7 weeks of radiation, the port taken out (too many heart issues with it), and 3 more weeks of radiation.
Now I get a shot once a month to strengthen my bones, tests every six months, and take tamoxifen daily.  If you have any questions you want to ask I am happy to answer.  I always hope my experience can somehow help someone else.

I have learned you don’t know how much time you have. I feel like I really started living after I found out I have this.  Don’t wait ‘till something like this happens to you to really live – to breathe in!   Use your time wisely.  Don’t wait ‘till you get a terminal illness to discover what is most important in this life.

I have to add get your mammograms.  I waited a year and 9 months in between.  If you have a stressful, physical job like I did and you get a tumor in your breast it can spread quickly.  So again, I cannot stress enough, get your mammograms.

In 2007 I went through Creative Call in the summer when I was off work (school bus driver).  After we, Tracy and I and I think a few other women from church, finished the book - I went back through some of it on my own.
One morning at work, we had 15-20 minute breaks between schools, I was reading and praying and asking God what He wanted me to do.   I just felt He wanted more.
I pulled out to go to pick up my middle school kids and the car in front of me had a license plate that read, “thinkart”.  Seriously??  I started laughing because I couldn’t believe God would be that literal or humorous.  I have done something art related since but never as much as now.  I thought then He wanted me to be full time at it but I just didn’t have the faith to step out and leave a paycheck and health insurance behind.

Now I have the time but I still struggle with doing.  Fear, feeling it isn't important, things needing done, calls needing to be made, Dr. appointments, etc.  all try to keep me from getting any art done.   I am very grateful for this group, for Tracy inviting me and driving me, and how it has helped me to gain some focus, get over some apprehensions, and actually get some work done.  So, to work I go.  And thank you to all who are involved.  I am praying for you to be able to hear and do the will of the Spirit!
This is the invocation of the Spirit that I wrote from last week;
Come Holy Spirit..
Fill us with God’s vision.
Give us strength to do,
dreams to create,
images, visions, music and dance to share,
and words that will inspire.
Give all of these things
so You will be glorified.

2 comments:

Claudia Lefkowitz said...

Vicki, Thank you for sharing your journey with us. I had no idea you are battling breast cancer. I am a survivor of 20 years. I will pray for you specifically for healing and for courage to overcome whatever fears hold you back.

You are an amazing artist. I loved your two-sided folded book. May God give you the time and the courage to do your next work.

Blessings be to you.

Claudia

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